FRIENDS AND PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

Have you experienced having a problem with your partner and friends try to come right under your nose and get into your nerves by meddling with your affairs and keep on giving you unsolicited advice which somehow affected your decisions---which you regret doing and having thought considering in the first place???

When it comes to love, noone else but you and your partner can patch up your differences. Who caused the problem in the first place??? No matter what you say, no matter how much people has affected your relationship, the problem still takes its roots from one of you. Who gets affected by all the influences around you??? If both of you are just strong enough to face the realities of life, you don't have to ask for outside help whenever your relationship gets into trouble.

Why???

Most of the time, if the people who try to help have other motives than patching up your differences, the gap becomes wider between you and your partner...the situation turns out to be more complicated than what it is before you asked for a friend's help. Basically, it's because these people do not really know what transpired in the relationship (lest you have been constantly updating your friends what goes on in the relationship from time to time!!!) Usually, your friends would take your side to make you feel all right. And once you feel that people symphatize with you, the more you would feel confident that whatever you did was right, no matter how wrong it was.

The problem with asking for help from other people is that you are not actually seeking for help to resolve your problem. Actually, what you really want is for people to sympathize or even emphatize with you. Too bad, by doing so you are just making things worse between you and your partner.

I'm not saying that people should not ask for help from friends. What i'm trying to say is that, we must choose the friends we talk to when it comes to matters of the heart. Not all people will try to keep you guys together...most of the time, people will cause you to not worry about your problem anymore to the point that they will ask you to do things which you would regret afterwards like leaving your partner behind by making it look like the problem is your partner and not any other issue.

To consult a friend or two...friends whom you can consider your confidante...would be enough. These people must be the ones who know not just you but both of you. They are the ones who can understand the situation better and can give you advice that would be helpful to the relationship and not cause to ruin it.

Yes, you can get by with a little help from your friend but don't leave the fate of your relationship in their hands...it is not them who should decide, it is you as a couple who should face life together...be it in boyfriend-girlfriend relationship or in marriage.